What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
