i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
