I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
