I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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