I heard we made out
ya dads aren't the best wingmen
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize
