hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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