Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
