tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
is that a dick in a sweater?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
