Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
did you just send me my own nude
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize