So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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