She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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