Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
