He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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