Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
