I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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