You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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