Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Randomize
