Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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