ya dads aren't the best wingmen
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize