i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
