You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Randomize