I need help removing her.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
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We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
