She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
