He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
