I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Randomize
