i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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