You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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