remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
