Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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