And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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