Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
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