She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
