i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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