I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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