Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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