I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
