Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
