My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
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