Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
