I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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