Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
