Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Randomize
