Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
He felt like a one man threesome
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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