where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
