The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I'm always down for nudity.
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