I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
