So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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