It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize