The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
