we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
