Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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